Thursday, April 10, 2008

An Unusual Anniversary

Last Sunday (April 6th) was the one-year anniversary of when we found out that Morgan was going to be joining our family! This was a joyful, yet bittersweet day for me as I not only remember the anticipation of the baby we now have, I remember the baby we lost.

November 12th, 2006 was when we found out about our first pregnancy. I remember looking at the lines on the test in disbelief because we'd actually succeeded on our very first try. This was unexpected in that at that time I was already 35 years old. I didn't know if I could even get pregnant much less on the first try!

Unfortunately that pregnancy ended in miscarriage on December 17th. I was almost 10 weeks along. It was a long drawn-out ordeal that I won't detail here, but we were completely heartbroken. The irony of that December 17th date was that when we found out about Morgan on April 6th...calculations put her due date on December 17th, 2007, exactly one year later. We were going to have a baby on the same day that we lost one. What a gift! What are the odds of that?

When I got that positive test a year ago I was thrilled and terrified at the same time. Would this pregnancy be "the one" or would "it" happen again? With all these thoughts in my head I sat down and cried on the floor of the room that would become Morgan's nursery. I think I hadn't even told David at that point. He was working at a Shock game and I had not attended because I had a nasty cold. Sitting on the floor I said a little prayer to God for the protection of this new life and also say thanks for the blessing of this new hope.

Every baby is a blessing, but for me the fact that I lost one, even as early as it was, makes every day I get to hold my little Morgan that much more special. I also know that Morgan has a little guardian angel in heaven that we will get to meet someday. Until then we will continue our journey with our precious new family...saying thanks each and every day.

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